Be on the lookout for those Austin Central Texas karaoke junkies singing at Karaoke shows around Austin
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You Know You're A Karaoke Junkie If...
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Youíve ever burned up a car to get to karaoke


Youíre broke all the time


You clap when a song finishes on the radio


You ever wake up from a sound sleep clapping


Strangers walk up to you in Wal-mart and compliment you on your singing


People you donít know ask, "Arenít you the karaoke dude?"


You get mad when you are skipped in the rotation


Songs on the radio donít sound right because Ernest or Roger arenít singing them


You hear a song on the radio and think, thatís number 7-12


You donít wear "the hat" and nobody knows you


Somebody says, "why donít we leave early?" and the whole crowd gasps(and early is 12:30 am)


You refer to "my list" ten months after youíve sold out


You find yourself engrossed in the philosophical ramifications of "AMERICAN PIE"


You go to a concert and wonder when theyíre gonna call you up to sing


You go to a concert and all the time youíre thinking "I could do that"


You write lists like this on the back of karaoke slips


Last call comes and you say "But Iím not through singing yet!"


Youíve ever been taken home passed out in the back of a 69 Cadillac hearse


Youíve ever ripped the door off a bar


You have laryngitis and you still try to sing


Blue drinks turn you into the INCREDIBLE HULK


You know youíve got to get up at 6:30 am and you still close the bar down


Thereís 12 inches of snow on the ground and ice on the roads and where are you? THE KARAOKE BAR!


You think "life without the role" are really the words


Someone asks you if you have a slip, and theyíre not talking about underwear!


Someone is writing "WHAT IF" lists during karaoke


You remember the number of over two songs by memory


You know everybodyís first name-and you donít know what their last names are


You know the location of every motel within five miles of the bar.


You donít remember the names of any waitresses before Sharon Peters.


You know the location of every karaoke bar within 50miles of your house.


When youíre not at the karaoke bar by 10:30pm people start calling your house to find out whatís wrong.


You would never consider dating someone with a bad voice.


Anything brighter than neon lights hurts your eyes.


Someone suggests going dancing instead and youíre appalled.


Your stock reply is "you mean thereís a bowling alley here."


That commercial on TV that makes fun of karaoke really makes you mad.


You see karaoke on TV and you think "Thatís not the way itís done!"


You actually know that karaoke means "empty orchestra."


It feels weird to go to a new karaoke bar and not sit at the "regulars" table


You get upset when someone else is sitting in your place


You throw up on somebodyís car---and they understand


You get mad when someone sings "your song"


The songs, "LOVE SHACK", "FRIENDS IN LOW PLACES", and "AMERICAN PIE" really annoy you (unless of course YOU want to sing them)


Someone refers to "the longest song in the book" and you know what theyíre talking about


The word "rotation" no longer conjures up thoughts of tires or sex


Youíve ever browsed the "net" under the heading "KARAOKE"


Youíve ever called a wrecker to take you and your car to the KARAOKE bar (hey it was contest night O.K.!)


You think itís a compliment when someone dedicates "THE BITCH IS BACK" to you


A new person who sings well is automatically your friend


Your new best friend is somebody who does the same type songs as you


You canít name five presidents,---BUT you know all the members of KISS and the EAGLES


The whole bar yells "OH CRAP" when youíre called to sing


You know the entire intro to "BABYíS GOT BACK"


You start believing your middle name is "lucy" or "louise"


You hear "whatís this fat f---er going to sing?" And youíre determined to sing them under the table


Anyone has ever suggested therapy


Youíve ever received an emergency call at the bar


You think you sound better than the origional


You can still sit still after listening to "LOVE SHACK" 5,000 times


Someone throws up because you sang too much ELTON JOHN


You think you can never sing too much ELTON JOHN


Someone suggests an after hours party and you ask "do you have a karaoke machine?"


You canít remember the words to a song youíve heard all your life without "the screen"


You and three other people have sung "FRIENDS IN LOW PLACES" after the karaoke has closed down


The first thing you think when you hear a new song on the radio is "when is this coming out on karaoke?"


You call the karaoke store and hound them about a disk


You buy a karaoke disk for one song---burning 14 other songs


You try to learn 14 songs you donít really like


You consider beer a lubricant for your vocal chords


You consider alcohol to be "Liquid Courage"


It takes you 15 minutes to hug everybody goodbye


Your best friend has to hold you up to sing your last song, and you never miss a note (hey it was TWIST OFF night O.K.!)


You canít sing until youíre nice and toasty


The high point of your week is when your favorite KJ gets a new disk


You cant stand up or walk but you never miss a note


You feel cheated if they donít get karaoke started at 9:00 sharp "bar time"


The term kamikaze has nothing to do with japan or planes


Your house guests get to your house 1-1/2 hours before you do


Youíre a woman but youíre still willing to sing the guys part


Youíre a guy but your still willing to sing Barbaraís part in "NO MORE TEARS"


You may be a karaoke junkie if you are planning to go to a new city and the first thing you do is get on the net and find out where they have karaoke!




* It is recommended that you call the show you are attending to verify that it is still on *

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